What Nobody Tells You

People are not unrivaled – our actions sometimes harm others and can result in feelings of shame and regret. These acts are often ones we try to hide from others and block out of our minds, possibly with the belief that that it’s best to rid yourself of it and pretend it never happened.

Unfortunately, these repressed acts from our past have negative effects. They often cause a person to feel troubled, unstable, and unhappy about their life. In many ways such acts share characteristics with some traumatic incidents, in that they are incidents which you don’t want to look at because they trigger painful or upsetting feelings. Less severe examples of shameful acts, especially those committed in youth, can also lead to similar negative effects later in life.

Traumatic incidents are usually considered to be powerful events that have happened to someone; we call these inflow incidents. These include, for example, being in a car accident, being raped, losing a loved one, losing one’s home in a fire or flood, or losing one’s job. Such traumas can negatively influence life long after the event is over. However, there are also outflow incidents, in which a person has caused pain or loss to someone else. Outflow incidents, like inflow incidents, also negatively influence one’s life. Traumatic Incident Reduction (TIR) can help free a person from the negative effects of past incidents, both those we have caused and those that have happened to us.

A TIR facilitator is trained to guide a client’s attention and to listen to what they say, without evaluation. The facilitator creates an environment in which the client feels safe to express what happened without fear of being judged. The opportunity to describe what was done provides great relief, as the charge, or harmful energy trapped in the repressed incident, is released. It would be a mistake to think that TIR, by itself, can completely correct all negative effects of past harmful acts. There’s value in many modalities and in the context of being person-centered, complementary work could be of benefit to you in addressing the effects such events have had on you and others as a good approach to taking responsibility for past harmful actions can include a number of different steps. An effective program reflects the particulars of each situation, so it is not possible to give a simple prescription which fits every case. TIR can be a vital step in such a program since it allows the person to better look at what was done and the consequences.

The result of completely dealing with those past buried incidents can be a renewed zest for living. An effective program can change the quality of your life. We think it is truly a worthwhile activity. Everyone can learn from past errors, and TIR allows us to move on with our lives despite not being perfect. If you are not feeling positive about your life, try some TIR!

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Bouncing Back from a Traumatic Incident